This is a very quiet half term for me. But as I was reminded by a neighbour on the way back to my house this morning - pretty awful if you have a house full of kids and it is pouring with rain!!
Well my house is quiet - more about that tomorrow - but I know when nothing verymuch is planned kids can be a real pain when the weather is miserable and they are feeling bored.
Click on the link below for a few ideas or register with us to receive the free ebook Keeping Kids Busy - which has the things from the old toilet roll game. (The kids bandage themselves up with toilet paper - and then dependent on which version and how many children are involved they race to unwrap it) - to the more obvious like board games, battleships and hunt the thimble.
If you really want to put a bit more planning in then why not organise a treasure hunt. It could be round the house - but if you don't mind the kids getting wet and they don't why not in the garden. If you want a few tips on how to set one up visit and other ideas then visit
http://www.helpforbusymums.com/occupying-the-kids-at-half-term.html
Routines and How they can Save you Time.
Early summer is a great time to re evaluate how we all do things. We start off with New Year resolutions but for most of us by the time we get to the end of January we have given up, or half forgotten what we were going to do differently this year.
Part of the problem is we are still suffering the excesses of Christmas during January.
So I have yet again decided to visit routines. You could say that this is a bit of a routine in itself. This was brought about by a good friend of mine who made this simple statement.
Routines are good. When I thought about this simple statement I realised how true it was. Especially as a lot of my routines are nonexistent!!
They save time. Things happen automatically when there are routines. As well as saving time orchestrating kids to get kids to do things it also saves the endless nagging.
Routines can be something as simple as cleaning your teeth before going to bed or something more challenging like getting to the gym.
They could be bedtime habits or eating habits.
They could be housework routines or keep fit routines They could be kids chores or time for you routines.
Routines are really just habits, but mainly habits with a positive ring to them.
So if habits are often bad routines, then perhaps to change or remove the bad habit we need to change or replace the bad routines.
Think about it. If like many mums you are trying to make a real effort to get the family to eat more healthily or watch less television, before you try to change the behaviour you need to change the routines which sits behind the behaviour. Then a good habit or routine will follow more easily.
Spending time examining the behaviour behind a habit, or an ineffective routine, is likely to result in much more long term success. For example: if you want the family to eat more healthily, then you need to make sure that there is a good range of healthy food in the house. This means in turn you need to do a healthy shop and work out some healthy recipes.
So what routines would you like to put in place?
And what input is needed by you to get your new routine in place?
Labels: effective timemanagement, efficiency, geting thins done, habits, routines
My girls are just beginning to sit their exams.
Daughter two is sitting her AS level exams and daughter three her GCSEs.
Throughout the house are post it notes, charts and revision cards stuck on doors light switches and by mirrors. Anywhere they are likely to be loitering and can stop and take a look for a few minutes.
Sitting on the loo is now quite educational for me too. I can see at a glance through a very self explanatory chart how Germany's power developed during the 1920's and 1930's and am even beginning to remember dates of the Treaties that were signed.
I never remember doing anything like this. Far more trouble is now taken in helping kids to revise "better" - certainly anyway at the school my girls attend.
I guess the most important thing is to try and reduce the anxiety around exams. Even if the kids do fail them it is not the end of the world. All that I ask is that they do their best - and lets face it there are lots of people who have been successful in life who have not done very well at school.
That's not to say I would not be disappointed - but it is also important to recognise that as much as I would like all my children to grow up and be successful rocket scientists or brain surgeons - that's about me not them.
So back to exam stress - what can we do?
Make sure they eat well and get a good nights sleep.
That perhaps we are a bit more tolerant of the odd outburst.
We make sure that they take regular breaks from revision and ideally do a bit of exercise in between. The brain works far better when it is well oxygenated!
My kids love horlicks and hot chocolate made with real chocolate. Comforting drinks or treats serve two purposes. One they will pep them up a bit, and two will show them you care. Sometimes this can work a lot better than talking to stressed adolescents.
For my ideas on dealing with stress -either for your kids, you or someone else in your life visit: http://www.helpforbusymums.com/stress-and-exam-nerves.html
Labels: exam nerves, GCSE exams, revision tips, stress, stressed kids
This blog continues the adventures of Woody and Jessie rabbit.
Initially my girls spent their pocket money on buying the rabbits, rabbit toys from the local pet shop. They were regularly bathed and brought in the house and played with, much to my consternation.
They also invested in rabbit leads. However these were not very successful as the rabbits managed to chew through them.
In fact the rabbits managed to chew through quite a lot of things including the flowers and the back of an old sofa which we kept in our family room. Even so I found myself becoming quite fond of these little rogues.
Woody had quite a temper on him and would enjoy picking up his china bowl with his mouth and throwing it around. Whether it was this particular occupation - or his diet - I don't know, but I seemed forever to be taking him to the vets to have his nails and teeth clipped. Apparently it is not uncommon for rabbits teeth to become dangerously long. (Fortunately Jessie was not suffering with this particular affliction - just the continuing gammy eye).
One time I had noticed not only were Woody's teeth very long but he seemed to be getting rather thin.
To summarise the prognosis, Woody had an
abscess on his gum and our local vet told me that any operation to remove this (as it was in the rabbits jaw) would be
unsuccessful and lead to a lot of suffering for the rabbit. I was told that Woody should be put to sleep.
Now as I said - I am not a great fan of rabbits, but this little chap seemed in quite good spirits jumping round the garden, despite being a bit on the thin side. So Woody had his teeth cut short yet again and I went away to have a think about what was the best thing to do.
Well thank goodness for the
Internet. I did hours of research and finally found a famous rabbit vet, just twelve miles from where we lived. This vet had written books on
veterinary rabbit stuff, and even had a rabbit operating table at her practice.
Woody was seen and given a quite different prognosis. She told me that she would not be able to remove all of the
abscess, but she could lance it. Rabbits she told me live very successfully in the wild with
abscesses in their mouths. She also suggested we had Woody's front teeth removed.
That was three years ago. My old vet was sceptical about the whole thing and just refers to him as the miracle rabbit. Woody does need his food or special treats like carrots to be cut up or even pureed -but apart from that seems quite happy. He often comes up and gives us a lick or sometimes you can see him sucking on the odd plant, but apart from that being toothless has not affected him one bit.
As for the girls -well they have long since lost interest in Jessie and Woody and regard them as a bit of a chore. So now most of the time there is 50/50 split of me and the girls looking after them. Yes I know I should be stricter and have made them take responsibility for them but sometimes you just have to stick to fighting the big battles and lose a few of the small furry ones.
So if rabbits are not really your thing - I would steer well clear of getting one. They are cute, cuddly and adorable but also in our case have been very expensive, time consuming and they live quite a long time! And sadly if you are like me you will grow very attached to them even if rabbits are not quite your thing.
For more articles practical advice go to http://www.helpforbusymums.com
Labels: busy mothers, childrens pets, looking after pets, pet care, pet rabbits, pets corner, rabbit care
As I sit down to write this I know I am putting off the dreaded deed. It is probably my least favourite job. But sadly it has got to be done. If I don't do it no one else will.
What is it? You may ask. It is clearing out the rabbits.
Almost seven years ago my daughter suddenly starting asking for a rabbit for her birthday. I was not keen. I don't "do" animals that are kept in cages. I am more of a dog person myself.
Anyway my protestations were far too feeble looking back. and guess what, a baby dutch rabbit appeared on my daughters birthday, bought as a present by a friend. Dutch rabbits are the small black and white variety, and I must say Woody as he is known was very sweet.
We went out and bought the hutch and took him to the vets for his
vaccinations and to be "done".
All of which set us back the best part of £200.
Initially he was cuddled and played with loads, predictably. He was so cute that he ended up spending far too much time in the house. ... stupidly. He even had a litter tray in the kitchen and became house trained. Sounds too good to be true ...well it was really.
Well it was until we went away for a long weekend. Friends were staying with us so they said they would look after Woody. I stupidly decided that as Woody was so well behaved he could stay in the kitchen and then have a run of the garden while we were away.
It was with surprise that when we returned three days later the kitchen looked a little different.
Our house sitters explained the problem. Every time they went out Woody went on the rampage. He managed to jump on the kitchen table and throw off whatever he could, which included crockery and glass tumblers. He had also somehow managed to get on the window sill above the kitchen sink, and eat all the leaves on my plants. Worse than that he had found a way to pull out the paneling underneath
the kitchen units. He obviously considered this a great burrow.
And to really rub in his glee at the chaos he was causing, he then even went on to trick our friends into thinking he was hiding in his new found burrow, which they were crawling round, while in fact he was watching them smugly from another corner of the room. My house sitters said it was like the film "Mouse Trap". It was the two of them against the rabbit. And the rabbit was winning!
Woody much to his disgust was
dispatched to live in his hutch. (And I felt very guilty because of course I don't like animals being kept in cages.) But there seemed to be no other choice. Woody was quite capable of wrecking the house.
As the months wore on daughter number three decided she wanted a rabbit for her birthday. I was even less keen, but of course a precedent had been set. So when it came to her birthday a few months later, I found myself driving round the local pet shops looking at baby bunnies.
We ended up with an identical dutch bunny who seemed to be living a forlorn life in an old fashioned pet shop, in an outlying village, some way from where we lived. Worse than that the rabbit had a gammy eye. But
daughter number three saw herself as this bunny' saviour, and as she had saved up her birthday money and was buying the bunny and another hutch, what could I say? Well actually, what I should have said was NO, but I didn't.
Approximately another £200 later, hutch,
vaccinations and treatment for the gammy eye, which never has really cleared up, we had two rabbits, in two hutches, as we were told unless they had been "brought" up together they would not mix.
Well that
wasn't true. Their hutches were placed opposite each other, and eventually we put them together and the two rabbits became the best of friends. Although Jessie, (yes they are both named after the Toy Story characters) , was always the more bossy and least tame of the two.
I would like to say that it is the end of the story and the expense. But the adventures of Woody and Jessie rabbit go on. But I now really do have to go and clear out their rabbit hutch, so I will continue this blog tomorrow.
Labels: animal care, busy mums, busymums, childrens pets, family meals, looking after pets, mom, moms, pets for children, rabbits, rabbits as pets
I have just sent out my monthly Busy Mums Bulletin. It is always an opportunity to have a think and try and put something which I think people like me may find useful and informative.
I thought it might be useful to put this excerpt into my the Busy Mums Blogg - for my entry today. You never know someone somewhere with a problem may find it a good way of tackling something which to date they have drawn a blank with.
I was once away at sales conference and speaking to a very successful man. And when I say successful - he seemed very financially successful to me, but more importantly, successful in the personal sense. He was self assured with clear personal values and integrity. Someone who I had a real sense of admiration for on many levels.
This prompted me to ask him what was his secret of success. He said to me "Recognise that every problem has not one solution but many - it will open up your life"
I have always remembered that and I really do now try hard to adopt that philosphy, when I come up against some problem or challenge.
I write down the problem and then all of the solutions I can think of. It does not matter how stupid or outrageous the solutions are - I write them down anyway.
I am not quite sure what happens - but this somehow seems to open up another creative window in my mind and from that appears even more solutions I had not thought of before. The end result, is a path I had not considered, or a "combination solution" which I would not have thought of, if I had not taken these steps. I owe that man a big thank you for his advice.
So next time you have a problem or challenge. It does not matter what area of your life it is - it could be work, relationships, money, or your family....
Try it - it works.
Labels: busy mothers, busy mums, busymums, coaching, parentcoaching, parenting tips, problem solving, school holidays parents, solutions to problems
When you are a Mum it is really easy to be at every ones beck and call without even realising it.
I remember when daughter number two was very small how she hoodwinked me into making her wait on her hand and foot.
I actually did not realise until it was pointed out to me by a friend of the family. He had a daughter just a few weeks older, who kept asking for things. You know the sort of thing, a drink, a biscuit a toy .... and so on. His little girl kept saying "I want...", and was quite demanding - and was quite understandably being reproached by her father for her continuing requests.
Until that moment I had felt quite smug. (Perhaps it showed on my face). That was until he pointed out to me that my daughter was a little more crafty with her demands. She said " I need".
And guess what.... I jumped to my feet without hesitation. He was right. She was crafty. She was calling the shots at just three years old and I had not twigged.
One of my daughters specialities was saying "I need...." just after I sat down, normally when I was going to eat a meal.
This meant I jumped up, often several times during every meal time, (as my other children joined in with requests). It was a source of irritation to me that I did not ever seem to sit down and eat a meal without it being interrupted.
The thing I realised when this "I need terminology" was pointed out - was that actually they were saying "I want..." and actually it wouldn't do them any harm....in fact it might be quite a good rule in patience and manners if they did wait.
Such a small thing I know....but it made quite a big difference to how much I enjoyed meal times.
As you can probably guess I invoked a new rule. Once I had sat down for a meal, I wasn't going to get up again until I had finished eating!
Well you may say what has that got to do with work life balance? - Well maybe its just all those small things you do which impact the quality of our leisure time. Its worth us all thinking how much we are at the mercy of the "I need...." trick.
More food for thought on work life balance for busy mums tomorrow.
Labels: busy mums, families, meal times, parenting, toddlers, work-life balance
Do you find yourself juggling all the people and projects in your life?
Do you think you need help with your "work life balance"?
As a busy working Mum of four children (and more recently three step children), I do my best to juggle all the people and projects in my life but sometimes not quite as successfully as I would like.
I
set up the Help for Busy Mums website because I wanted to create a resource that parents can go to, keep up to date with what is going on in the world of parenting. Alongside that, I offer coaching and personal development to corporate clients and individuals.
Coaching is not counselling or therapy of any kind. It is the opportunity for you to work or get support on things which are important to you in your life in a objective and confidential environment, where no one is going to judge or make decisions on your behalf.
Sometimes you are so busy rushing about you aren't able to stand back and objectively work out how you can make changes which will lead to you feeling happier less worried and having time for the things most important to you.
As the Home Page of my site states "Things which matter most must never be at the mercy of things which matter least". But sadly for many of us they are.
In corporate terms this roughly translates to productivity and a happy work force
So if you you find yourself worrying that you do not seem to have enough time in the day?.
Your priorities are constantly going out the window?
Or maybe you are losing site of what is really important to you. Then you might want to consider contacting us at http://www.helpforbusymums.com
Labels: coaching, help for mums, mentoring, parent coaching, someone to talk to, work life balance
